So… here’s another old post that got forgotten over the summer. I REALLY want to get better about blogging again, and I wanted to get these drafts published first. Bear with me, friends!
Who hates potty-training? I do! I guess a downside to working with kids prior to actually having kids means you know some of the hard parts before you get to them with your own offspring. Potty-training is one of them for me.
My first experience with potty-training was with a few of the kids with autism that I worked with through WEAP. We approached it step-by-step, with getting used to sitting on the potty first and eventually leading up to a “potty day” where we basically worked hardcore on getting successes on the toilet for a whole day. It took a lot of patience and hard work! Next I worked on potty-training with a few kids when I worked at the Child Development Center in England. These kids were under 2, and I think some were more ready than others. It definitely seemed like girls were more ready than boys in most cases. And that was another reason I was nervous to start potty-training my little guy.
But I decided to jump in and start anyway! Around 18 months, I introduced a potty book and a little Elmo potty in the playroom. Gerrit liked the book, and we practiced having his stuffed animals sit on the potty during the day if he showed interest in the Elmo potty. I didn’t want to use the Elmo potty for actual potty-training because I didn’t want to transition between that and the actual toilet. So despite him being pretty little yet, I bought this potty seat and stool for the bathroom.
(Okay, how do I seriously have no pictures of this kid on the potty?! I’ll try to add one later, sorry, guys! Here’s a cute one in just a diaper though, haha ^)
A little before Gerrit turned 20 months, I started having him sit on the potty seat on the toilet before bath time. He was definitely apprehensive about it, and he would only sit for a second or two to start. I made sure to praise him just for sitting on it though. If he said he didn’t want to sit on the potty, I never forced it. Eventually we had an accidental tinkle on the potty! And then Phase One of potty-training was pretty much complete!
Once Gerrit realized what the goal was, he started going pee on the potty pretty regularly. I try to sit him on the toilet at every diaper change, and he almost always pushes a little something out, haha! He loves getting praised for a potty success! Sometimes he wants to read one of his bath books while he’s on the potty, and reading a book on the toilet was actually how we got that first success from him. I’m so proud of him for doing as well as he is right now!
So what’s next? I really would like him to have a poop success on the potty, but I’m not rushing that! And I also want him to start telling me when he has to go. He told Andrew once “pee pee” and proceeded to have a success on the potty (yay!), but that hasn’t happened since. I’m not rushing any of this, since Gerrit is still really young, and I want him to have a positive experience with this. I have heard too many stories about kids being pushed to potty-train earlier than they were ready and shutting down and refusing to potty-train because of it. So I’m hoping that easing Gerrit into all of this is the way to go. Wish us luck! 🙂
Yep, it’s that time again. Sleep regression hell!! We have gone through every single possible regression that people talk about, but the worst ones were 4 months, 10/11 months, 15 months, and this 18 month one. One reason why I think they are so awful, is because after the previous regression, your body started to get used to sleeping again. So when that goes out the window, it’s particularly cruel punishment.
Gerrit’s 18 month sleep regression kicked in right around 18-1/2 months. We were starting to have some better nights of sleep: 3 hour stretches were becoming normal, with 4 or 5 hour stretches mixed in. Definitely not ideal, but better than things had been! Around mid-May, things started going downhill: frequent night wakings, difficulty settling back to sleep, late nights & early mornings. It’s always tough when these regressions happen, because I feel like, Haven’t we moved past this? I thought you knew how to sleep better! But since we have been through so many sleep regressions, I knew this one was coming.
So how to deal? Well, I never thought Andrew being on swings shift would be a positive thing, but it has been a godsend to me! Yeah, it’s rough getting through dinner and bedtime on my own sometimes, but one thing I can count on is Andrew getting up with Gerrit every morning.
A morning where I was sleeping and G & Dada did breakfast
The sleep regression means that I bring Gerrit to bed more often around 4 or 5 in the morning. If he makes it in his crib until 6 or so in the morning, Andrew will get him up and bring him to me to nurse in bed. Andrew dozes off for a bit longer while I nurse, but once Gerrit is done, he takes him out to the living room and deals with breakfast and playtime with Gerrit until 9 or 10 in the morning. Those extra couple of hours of sleep are heavenly. And they really help get me some extra rest to get through the day without sleeping while Gerrit naps every day.
The crappy thing about major sleep regressions is that they don’t only attack night sleep. The 18 month sleep regression brought difficult naps too. Some days Gerrit would fight his nap for almost an hour. Other days he’d wake up after only 45 minutes or an hour, and I’d have to try to get him back to sleep (sometimes it worked, sometimes it didn’t). When your kid has a rough night (which means you had a rough night) and then they don’t nap well either? SO IRRITATING!
So tired from waking up way too early that he is laying on the floor
So here we are at about 7 weeks into this mess. We are starting to have better nights, but then we have a really crappy night again.
I wrote everything above this in mid-June. It’s now mid-September, and I saw that this wasn’t published haha. Oops. It’s been a crazy summer, so I’m cutting myself some slack for that. Anyway, we survived the 18 month sleep regression, with all of its ups and downs. I’m not even sure when it improved, since Gerrit’s sleep is never great. We have been traveling for a good chunk of the last month or so, so that never helps things. More on that in a post soon. I hope!
In March we took back to back trips to see family. The first one was to Reno (via plane) and the second one was to Chattanooga (via car). We hadn’t flown with Gerrit since he was 3 months old. Needless to say, I was worried about it! So I thought I would blog about what worked for us, what went poorly, and what I would have done differently.
Reno
First up was our trip to Reno! I was very apprehensive about this trip, despite Andrew telling me I had to just relax. He likes to remind me that “we can’t just stay at home forever.” I am horrible about worrying things to death before they even happen.
I packed for Reno without a list. That’s a big deal for me! I think as Gerrit gets older, there are fewer things to pack, and obviously space is limited with air travel. And Andrew always tells me that “if we forget something, we can buy it there.” And it’s true… there are few things that we pack that can’t easily be purchased at our destination. So that’s #1: If you forget something, you can almost always buy it at your destination!
Thankfully we had an afternoon flight, so there was no major rushing around the day of our trip. We had to drive to Raleigh for our flight, which is about an hour away. I was hoping Gerrit would take a little nap, and he did… 15 minutes before we got to the airport. So typical of him, haha. He was awesome for everything leading up to the flight though: taking the shuttle to the airport, standing in line, going through security… anytime there’s a lot going on, Gerrit just wants to sit and watch everything and everyone.
Gerrit loved watching the planes! That was the best distraction while we waited for our flight.
Andrew is adamant about safety, especially on planes, so Gerrit had his own seat on the flight so he could use his car seat.
We tried to keep him entertained in there as long as he could, but he wanted to get out, so Andrew and I switched off holding him in our laps for most of the flight. We brought quite a few books to entertain him, since he usually likes books more than toys. My #2: Bring things they like! They worked for awhile, but a 5 hour flight is REALLY long for a 1-year-old. He wanted to nurse on and off, which wasn’t a big deal when he was a newborn. But at 16 months? Either his head or his feet were sticking out in the aisle, so we sat pretty scrunched up most of the time.
We had a layover in Vegas, I think, which was great for Gerrit to stretch his legs. Being in such a confined spot was hard for all of us! The last flight was short, and Gerrit slept for about 45 minutes of it. By the time we arrived in Reno, it was about 7pm there… which was 10pm back home. So Gerrit was going on about an hour total of sleep, poor kid.
You’d think that minimal sleep would mean more sleep at night, but that’s not how Gerrit rolls. That first night in Reno he only got 8-1/2 hours of sleep. We tried to keep him on a consistent schedule, but I really feel like any major disturbance for Gerrit shows up in his sleep. We did our best to do #3: Try to replicate home for sleep. We packed sleep sacks, our sound machine, a night light, his blankets, and Lamby. I don’t know if it’s just a different location or if he truly hates the Pack N Play, but sleep was still crap while we were in Reno. Maybe all the stuff we packed would have been enough to help the average kid, which is why I recommend trying to replicate home.Our flight back to North Carolina was early in the morning. Gerrit and I had had a particularly bad night with minimal sleep the night before, but he did sleep for a bit in the guest room bed while Andrew & I packed up. It was a long day though. My exhaustion did not make me a very happy traveler. I was literally falling asleep while reading books to Gerrit on the plane! I think he took two 45 minute naps all day (one of them being in the car on the way home from the airport). We had a really rough night that night too. This is why I hate traveling! I love seeing family & friends; I love having fun with them. I hate that it affects Gerrit’s sleep so much.
So the next day, I did a bunch of laundry, then we repacked our suitcases for our road trip to Tennessee! The thing I like about road trips over plane trips is 1) flexibility with time, 2) no limits on what you can pack (you know… within reason!), and 3) you can stop as much as you want! But car trips are l-o-o-o-o-n-g. I usually end up in the backseat with Gerrit at some point to entertain him, so we pack a lot of books! Toys are great, but there’s only so much a kid can do in a car seat. I spent most of my time entertaining Gerrit with books and songs. I was SO ready to arrive at our destination.
At a rest stop on the way to TN
So one of the biggest perks for us at the house my parents rented was that my little family got the master bedroom. And it had a king size bed. If you have never shared the bed with your toddler, you won’t really appreciate the space in a king size bed. But with Gerrit sleeping so poorly, I opted to bring him to bed with me when he just wouldn’t settle back to sleep in the Pack n Play. King size bed = enough space for us all!! I actually got some sleep with Gerrit cuddled up next to me. So here’s #4: If you tend to bed share, make sure you get a king size bed! It made nights so much easier for me, even when Gerrit didn’t want to sleep.
#5: Try to keep to your child’s normal schedule. When we were in Reno, this was tricky, because there was a 3 hour time difference. But Chattanooga was the same time zone as us, so that made it a bit easier to stick to our normal time frame for things.
Family photo on Easter
It didn’t always work for us. For example, Gerrit napped on the way home from church on Easter, and he wouldn’t go down for an additional nap because of that. We also left the zoo early when we went with my family, hoping to get back to the house for Gerrit’s nap.
Unfortunately, he fell asleep in the car for 45 minutes and, once again, wouldn’t go down for an additional nap. Ugh… car naps! But a short nap meant that he had a good stretch of sleep first thing that night, so that was nice!
The trip back to North Carolina was really pretty: so many flowers and trees in bloom! Gerrit took a good hour-and-a-half nap on the way home, but I still had a long afternoon of trying to entertain him in the car. I don’t feel like Gerrit eats like the average toddler (he doesn’t eat a lot and likes to nurse frequently), so do what you want with my #6: Try to keep his/her belly happy. For me, that meant nursing Gerrit while we drove. It’s kind of uncomfortable for me (you know, leaning over the car seat), but it keeps him happy and assures me that he’s getting something in his stomach. We tried Cracker Barrel (no luck with dinner) and Jimmy John’s (I think he ate a tiny bit), but Gerrit is just not a good eater, especially when we’re traveling. My recommendation would be to have favorite snacks packed and ready, and give them a cup of water to have available.
When we got home, we had a rough night! Gerrit fell asleep for 45 minutes in the car, and after we got home we hurried him through a bath and our normal bedtime routine. He had almost a 4-hour stretch to start, but lots of wakings after that. He had another rough night following that, but then settled back into a 3-4 wakings a night trend (which was good at the time).
What do I wish I had done differently? I wish I had just relaxed and been able to “go with the flow” a bit more. I get so worked up about Gerrit’s sleep that I miss out on fun things. I will always look back and wish I had not obsessed over this or that so much though. That just seems to be part of my personality, and it’s something I will probably always have to work on.
So good luck to you if you plan on traveling with your toddler. For us it wasn’t the worst thing in the world, but traveling with kids never seems to be easy. I feel like it gets a bit easier as Gerrit gets older, but it’s never my favorite thing to do. It certainly hasn’t kept us from traveling all over and seeing family & friends though! 🙂
On An Even Kiel 